Glaring Notebook Cubed

Trashed Three
Posted by Albert, 3:54:38 PM 28th May 2006 in Pictures

And now, for the answer to the second instalment of the Guess That Trashcan series.

The trashed trashcan was on the island between Lot 10 Plaza and Sungei Wang Plaza. You'd see it if you crossed the road on Bukit Bintang Road.

Stephanie Foo answered "Bintang Walk" correctly, again. Since I can't think of anything else to pimp you about I'll just buy you Teh O the next time okay? :D (Or the equivalent in whichever place we happen to meet.)

I'm beginning to wonder if you have an affixation with trashcans, but hey it's good to be observant.

cyber-red gets a close second place for guessing one half of it, "Lot 10". Titoki gets 1/10th for guessing the other half - "Sg wang", but she also threw in 4 other guesses, so we divide that half-right guess by five, and 1/10th accuracy gets you no pimpin' link. Sorry.

Replies: 17

Trashed Can
Posted by Albert, 4:46:06 PM 26th May 2006 in Pictures

And now, for the second instalment of the Guess That Trashcan series.

Replies: 13

That Rock Chic Gig
Posted by Albert, 1:09:51 AM 25th May 2006 in Pictures, Music

And now, for pictures from the Rock Chic's Night Out, 'A Celebration of Rock Ladies', a rock gig featuring female performers, on the 12th of May 2006 (see I updated within this month!)

Rhapsody was first, with their non-rock inclinations leading to samba and jazz stuff. Nicole's powerful voice and stage presence is indeed captivating.

(Irrelevant pictures might get downsized, like Lainie's chicken chop. Yeah, she's the man, she orders chicken chop during a rock gig.)

Jasiminne for this shot of Melina and a Flying V.

So does the drummer Stephanie. Well, maybe.

(Beer and women. Happiness.)

Tempered Mental do that.

Applecreed was next. Check out the lyrics!

Nah, she wasn't referring to her arms at all. I see a place where she could write a whole song on. ;)

Yes, you can be fashionable in black and white.

They're serious, with serious, non-girly guitars like this Paul Gilbert Model Ibanez.

Paul thinks they're MILFs. :D

lyrics and pictures and videos!

Replies: 5

Can Guess Trashcan
Posted by Albert, 11:53:47 AM 24th May 2006 in Pictures

inaugural Guess That Trashcan competition!

I present to you Stephanie Foo, regular reader (and first time commenter) and shisha-stoning buddy! She is cool, she knows people I know, she doesn't know the difference between Chinese Tea and Teh O but I know some cool people who don't, either.

To achieve the effect, I adjusted the levels on an infrared picture so the shadows were cyan and the highlights were still purple. I then used Hue/Saturation/Lightness to further break the face into more regions of saturated color.

P.S. If it wasn't this Stephanie Foo who commented... uh, identify yourself more distinctively next time. :P

Replies: 3

Raid I
Posted by Albert, 1:50:14 AM 24th May 2006 in Rants, Pictures

Since you guys enjoy looking at various parts of my body, I shall enthrall you with another shrunken picture.

My camera's red eye reduction is not working."

I'm being emo, with the realization of it all, but find no time to blog about it, rambling otherwise over random chords which will be forgotten. Electrical energy from the brain triggers chemical energy translated into kinetic energy, and then to heat energy and sound energy on guitar strings, and...

Whoa, where does the sound go? Does it heat the walls?

Oh, speaking of questions, I watched the fictional Da Vinci Code movie. I quite forgot who was who and who worked for who and who was whoever's master on the Opus Dei or Priory Of Scion. However, I did Google The Last Supper, and hey... that's not supposed to be Mary Magdalene; it's supposedly John. If Mary was there, wouldn't there be 14 people in total, instead of 13? (Jesus, 12 disciples including Judas, and Mary.) Quite annoying was the super big apertures used, like in the scene where Professor Langdon gets in the elevator, and the camera is rolling its manual focus in and out all over the place. It was as if the scene was created just to show that effect!

I reckon they might've gotten some F1.2 lenses to play with. :o The extreme macro effect was apparent when Sophie was about to be ambushed by the baddie lurking in the background, even more blurred out than in any other movie. Understandably, the moviemakers probably were not allowed to install lamps all over, so they had to use extra big apertures to shoot in natural light. (I'm just guessing here.) Despite that, the faces were rarely completely, sharply focused.

Which runs back to me being emo. Do you want to know the truth, or continue living the happy lie?

But enough of that! I hereby announce the all-new Guess The Trashcan series. Guess where this trashcan was from! The first person to answer correctly will be pimped in my next blog entry. I promise at least one paragraph.

Replies: 10

Stadium Arcadium In A Box
Posted by Albert, 1:53:59 PM 23rd May 2006 in Pictures, Music

My favorite ever band is back after four years!

The limited edition boxset has two audio CDs, one all-regions DVD, a 3D 'layered' cover, a bigger lyrics booklet, a notepad, a small wooden top with cardboard planets which can be put on it, artwork by each member, and...

This was probably the artsiest I could bother making the marbles look.

Of course, some of you might just go for the DVD, which is worth the price alone; it has the making of the Dani California video, the Dani California video itself, and a commentary of 25 songs. Interestingly, there is no interviewer during the commentary; Anthony and Flea are sitting on a sofa talking to each other about the songs, and Anthony tells Flea what each song is about, and Flea goes, "hmmm yeah that was what I was feeling, even before reading the lyrics". They also talk about which songs they didn't like at first. In the hall (I presume, the house they recorded Blood Sugar Sex Magik and Stadium Arcadium in) John and Chad talk about beats, grooves, and John occasionally picks up a guitar to show a riff. I wish they'd put a little sound clip for each song commentary, as I'd have to refer to the lyrics to see which song it was.

If you're a fan of the Red Hot Chili Peppers' later stuff, get the double CD album; a true fan would get the box set.

Funny how Incubus followed a similiar path; start heavy with funk rap metal, make a sober mainstream album (Californication or Make Yourself), make a melancholic sleeper (By The Way or Morning View) and hit everybody back with the best of their styles (Stadium Arcadium or A Crow Left Of The Murder). The boys have a new winner, with a double CD the price of one CD.

Click here for the review of the two CDs, on freshly fresh-looking Xfresh.

On a side note, check out what I found on Rick Rubin, producer extraordinaire! He is going to produce:

Untitled - Justin Timberlake (2006), produced by Timbaland, Will.i.am and Rick Rubin (The Neptunes are not on the list, sadly... but Rick Rubin knows his rock and hip hop, so I'd expect something rather interesting from this tattoo-collecting bad-boy-becoming... boy.)

Untitled - Linkin Park(2006) (Another very interesting prospect; he might steer them into credible nu-metal. I didn't care for them much other than Hybrid Theory and Meteora.)

Untitled - Slayer (supposed to launch 6-6-₂₀₀6)

Untitled - Metallica (2006/2007) (Goodbye bass-playing Bob Rock. I reckon he'd let Kirk Hammett solo again.)

Untitled - Kid Rock (2006/2007)

Untitled - The Faint (2006/2007)

American VI - Johnny Cash (possibly 2007)

Man oh man, am I excited.

Replies: 6

Sucker For Massage
Posted by Albert, 7:59:04 PM 19th May 2006 in Pictures, Travelling

So I was bored, after getting a 1 Gigabyte Dual-Voltage Reduced-Size Multi-Media Card for my Nokia N70, and so I went to get the foot massage I intended to get sometime back. Yeah, no more freeloading off OSIM chairs; I wanted to try the real thing!

I walked down the famous Bukit Bintang Road, with all the foot massage parlors. Old ladies with laminated sheets called out. "Want foot massage? RM20 half hour." they said. Some also said, "Young lady massage. Very nice wan." I didn't want any of that. The pictures also showed vacuum tubes and candles. No thanks.

I walked around, and none of the shops looked less seedy than the last.

And so, at the end of the block, I went to the other side, facing BB Plaza. Same rates, same look.

Up the curve, near The Chicken Rice Shop, however, was a Malay foot massage stall! It was open air, so no seedy business. I didn't see any candles or needles or vacuum tubes, so I sat down on one of those vinyl-strung beach chairs.

A friendly-looking, slightly built looking Malay man attended to me. "Pertama kali?" (First time?) I said yes.

He convinced me to take the one-hour package because apparently, the half-hour one was only on the foot and didn't get rid of the wind in my legs. Okay, whatever that meant.

He unrolled my trousers up to my knees, poured lotion all over, and started his work. I only cringed when he kneaded the bones with his knuckles.

Halfway through, he brought out a few bamboo-made cups (the size of a coffee mug) with Chinese insignia on them. Eh? He took out a fire torch, dipped it in a bottle of kerosene and lit it with a lighter!

Holding the cup upside down, he put the flaming torch inside the cup (presumably to create a vacuum) and swiftly cupped the cup on my knees, calves and base of my foot. He placed about 10! The torch was a bit too close, so I said, "errr jangan bakar bulu ya..." (don't burn my leg hair okay?)

Apparently the longer the cups stay, the more wind I have in my feet. Some dropped off sooner than others, presumably it had finished draining the wind? I don't know.

He timed it just nicely to finish by one hour. He eventually popped off the leftover cups, and the 'windy' spots were red and sore. Massaging them stung a bit.

When I thought it was over, he then reclined my chair all the way. "Releks sikit", he said.

He then put his legs around mine, as if to ride me like a horse! I instinctively covered my groin.

(And this is where one of my MSN nicknames came in...)

And then he got on top of me and said, "control pisang".

He then massaged my thighs. I controlled my pisang alright. He then inclined my chair and finished with a short back massage. He also told me not to bathe for that night to keep the warm effect of the massage.

Me, being polite Albert, did not take any pictures of the process, or how cool the cups looked sticking onto my feet. However, I took one after, at home.

I shall hereby give you ample warning for a horrible picture involving my legs and sore bumps.

Replies: 16

An Ode To Indomee
Posted by Albert, 1:49:38 AM 19th May 2006 in Rants

So William brought me to this mamak near Taman Bahagia LRT station, where he reckoned that they'd serve food to fix my craving.

Yes, I am a boring mamak person (in terms of food, not conversation, I think...); I go to mamaks and order the same thing. Back then it was nasi lemak (until the allergy to peanuts returned). Then I tried cheese naan and blogged many blog posts about it. Then there was Uncle Lim's roti bakar.

However, I have found a new food item to benchmark mamaks by:

Indomee.

Indomee, Indomee.

A celebration of mee.

In this day and age where mee goreng is saturated with oil and parsley and onions and prawns and cucumbers and garlic and carrots and other weird things, Indomee is a return to the basics.

Indomee is not about the brand. When you order Indomee at a mamak, you're not paying for the brand of IndoMie Mi Goreng; you're paying for them to keep all that junk out. Indomee isn't the brand; Indomee is the preparation. Indomee is to Maggi Mee as Chinese Fried Rice is to Kampung Fried Rice.

What makes an Indomee?

1) mee
2) the brown sauce, somewhat salty and savoury but does not leave an icky coating on your tongue like Hokkien Mee, and
3) the ~~half-boiled egg~~ "sunny-side-up" egg, or telur mata kerbau (thanks to the well-eatery-travelled KY for the correction.)

Anything else is junk.

You take the jiggling yellow egg yolk, you poke a hole on its surface, and you dribble it all over the mee. The egg yolk mixes with the brown sauce, unleashing the hidden flavor.

You then twirl some strands of mee, slice a bit of floppy egg white and stab it with your fork. Place food in mouth and enjoy!

William wondered what it would be like, with chicken.

I say no!

The essence of Indomee is the principle. Simple, with just three items. No chicken. Chicken distracts. It's supposed to be a celebration of mee; not mee complementing the chicken. (Similiarly, I believe that Chinese Fried Rice should not have any item bigger than a prawn, like an awkward vegetable stalk.)

The other essence of Indomee is its ease to eat. No parsley, no carrot, no peas, no onions, nothing for any fussy eater. The sauce is not soupy, so there's no dribble.

The last essence? The softness/floppiness. The mee is soft and springy. So is the egg white. Adding chicken, bacon, sausages, onions makes the meal not as soft and fast to digest.

Options

The waiter will often ask if you want single or double packet, as a single packet is never filling. However, be wise! Having double packet will mean twice the mee, but with only one egg; the ratio of egg yolk to brown sauce will not be optimal.

Hence, you should instead order two Indomee plates, so you get enough egg to go around.

I'm gonna pick up my guitar and write a song.

(P.S. Picture not included because I don't want to crave Indomee each time I visit my own blog.)

Replies: 16

Random Emo Post To Paint Nails Black To
Posted by Albert, 6:59:40 PM 14th May 2006 in Rants

I have all these voices in my head telling me to do this, to do that. So many things to accomplish, but they contradict each other. Going uphill slow, then crashing and tumbling downhill.

Depressing.

The last thing I need is another book, another opinion because that's rarely what I want to read.

(Edited add-on): So I was Googling Transformers Cybertron Downshift to find out which muscle car he most looked like, when I stumbled upon the coolest mother, ever. She played bass, listened to proto-punk and drove muscle cars. And her son got a Fender for his birthday!

Replies: 4

Troubadours This May
Posted by Albert, 12:42:12 AM 12th May 2006 in Pictures, Music

And now, for a trip down Changkat Bukit Bintang, for the Troubadours gig at La Bodega KL on the 7th of May 2006. This marks the first time I use slow shutter speeds with flash (instead of the default 1/60 seconds) at this venue, always getting frustrated otherwise. (Jamasia has colored lighting, so it's not so bad.)

They started with the open-mikers first, like Jay, the guy I once said sounded like Billy Corgan singing Kurt Cobain, which I missed. Why? I went to pee at the male toilet upstairs, and couldn't unlock the door! A guy climbed in from a panel above to break open the handle and unscrew the bolt, but that didn't work either, until he used the handle to open it again. I came out to some cheers. The guy who was stuck in the toilet!

Khai-Lee who might've found it a bit dark to find the guitar frets. :P

I think these dudes were Chi Too and Hon Mun on the right. (And yay he can sing.)

Azmyl Yunor. (Though I think there are better excuses to get free entry to his gigs. :P)

Estrella, oh how pretty and sweet voices they had to jazzy beats.

Alang of alternative-ish grunge unit Men Under Zero Effort is the other third.

Broken Scar, featuring Zalila Lee on percussion, Jerral Khor on guitar, Kevin on guitar and vocals, and Alda on bass. Subject to change; parts may vary.

documentaries that were recently banned despite approval, Zalila also supplies beats.

Justin Wong is recognizable with his black Suzuki acoustic guitar.

Shock System had the white political rap sound. Great guitar riffs and song dynamics. I thought they'd sound like Rage Against The Machine on electric.

Rhapsody for an Alanis Morissette cover. Gig old-timer Peter Hassan Brown then joins for the cover of Time After Time.

These church guys are fantastic, (plus they got ~~stage~~ performing stool persona) and they're later joined by who I assume is a church girl.

Damn my memory, must be all those drinks people ask my assistance to finish.

Replies: 6

Com-Plain Roti None
Posted by Albert, 12:37:58 PM 11th May 2006 in Rants, Pictures

Some ex-colleagues rave about the food in my office cafeteria, finding excuses to come over for the classic Chinese Fried Rice. Some current colleagues can't stand the food here and complain that it never changes.

Till one fine day when we got a memo via email about the new Tandoori Chicken with Roti Naan. Being the Cheese Naan and Tandoori Chicken lover I was, I had to check it out. Besides, where else would you get it during lunch hour? Normal naan-providing eateries only open in the evening. (However, they only served it on Mondays and Thursdays.)

From: (me)
To: (the sender)
Subject: RE: Cafeteria Special

Hi,

I think the roti naan that comes with the set meal looks and tastes like a chapati instead. (Refer to attachment.) Could it be duly replaced with a proper naan the next time? Thanks.

The tandoori chicken however, is top notch. Keep it up! :)

Regards,
Albert Ng

And so, I received a reply:

Dear Albert,

Thank you for your constructive comment. Much appreciated. The caf?anager and I were aware of the quality of the naan bread as this is the 1st time we are trying out with the new oven. For your information, the caterer has taken the positive step to enhance the caf?are by introducing the Tandoori Set and employing an experience cook to specially prepare the item. I assure you that positive action has been taken by the caterer to improve the naan bread. Your continuous support and feedback will definitely assist us to enhance the cafeteria.

Thank you.

Regards
(the name)

Screw diabetes, bring on the cancer! (Kidding kidding.)

The meal was RM6.50, for those of you who will eventually ask. RM1.50 covers the drink, and RM1.50 covers the roti naan, so RM3.50 for a premium piece of tandoori chicken was well worth it.

The moral of the story?

If you want change, chase it. There lies a systemic disorder in Malaysia. Yes, this was an easy request, and a lot of things are harder to change in this country, but we gotta stop sitting around in mamaks complaining to our friends, because nothing will get done.

Replies: 11

Girl(s) At The Rock Show
Posted by Albert, 5:09:24 PM 10th May 2006 in Music

What: Rock Chic's Night Out, 'A Celebration of Rock Ladies', a rock gig featuring female performers
Who: Tempered Mental, Candy, Plush, Blunt, Applecreed, Rhapsody
When: 8pm onwards, 12th May 2006
Where: Jamasia, Desa Sri Hartamas
How Much: RM20 with a free beer or soft drink (for guys) and free for girls

Yes I am going. :D

Replies: 6

Cutting (Glass) Edge
Posted by Albert, 4:01:28 AM 7th May 2006 in Pictures, Geek

To fix the short-sightedness of my infrared-cut-filter-removed Fujifilm Digital Q1, I needed to place a similiarly sized glass in front of the CMOS sensor, where the infrared cut filter once was.

I also bought safety goggles and gloves.

I marked the line to be cut with cellophane tape, using the original infrared cut filter to measure. I then scored across the line repeatedly with the glass cutter, so I could easily snap it.

Never fear! I then used one of the shards, cut it twice, and managed to get close to the size.

Fazri to find that glass shop.

Replies: 11

Long Hair Can Do
Posted by Albert, 5:59:59 AM 6th May 2006 in Rants, Pictures, Music, General

And now, for something different. Albert talks about shampoo!

Ever since I dyed my hair blue, I was not to ever use regular shampoo; I was supposed to use color-lock shampoo.

And so, I bought Sunsilk's color-lock shampoo, a red bottle of shampoo. What a sham. It wears your dye out faster than you can say 'senile peacock'.

It wasn't until I was wandering around aimlessly in Jaya Jusco Kepong that I called Leech to ask what color-locking shampoo she used to keep her then wonderful purple streaks. She said Loreal. (The voice in my head said, "Because you're worth it.")

And so I went home, and upon opening it, I immediately smelled the difference - it was citrus-ish, and yet, strangely appetizing. I applied it to my hair. It seemed to just... absorb into my hair!

Even when washing it off, I could feel the difference. It was silky! It was smooth! It was coated... unlike the Sunsilk one, which just seemed to wash off hair oils, leaving my hair frizzy and unable to hold any position (e.g. tucked.) Plus, after washing off the Sunsilk shampoo, I could see the suds on the bathroom floor stealing my hair color. :(

And oh, the smell! As long as they make shampoo smell this good, I will never get to have dreadlocks. (My original plan was to dye my hair, then grow it long and make a mess out of it, getting natural dreadlocks, then going bald.)

The best thing about the shampoo, however, is its fragrance - I just came back from drenching my hair in cigarette smoke at the-now-paying Twilight Action Girl at Zouk, and it managed to get rid of the smell! I usually take two washes to stop smelling like an ashtray.

If you think I've gotten a newfound girly fetish with hair, well it is not the shampoo models I covet. My inspiration for my style, long and straight comes from these macho rock bands:

Replies: 9

Transformy pr0n
Posted by Albert, 11:22:48 PM 4th May 2006 in Pictures, Toys

And now, for a barrage of Transformer pr0n. No, not tranny pr0n, thank goodness.

No, this is not a Transformer Alternator - in fact, it is a knock-off.

Another innovation would be how the lights from the engine can then be reused on the weapon, to light up the side boosters!

And now, for a real Transformer Alternator - Optimus Prime, a Dodge Ram pickup truck.

And here he is, with Sideswipe the Dodge Viper and Windcharger the Honda S2000.

Juveniles versus the authority: From left, Grimlock the Ford Mustang GT, Meister the Mazda RX-8, Prowl the American Acura RSX (Honda Integra for the rest of the world) and Hound the Jeep Wrangler.

The Dodge SRT-10 family.

"Autobots, roll out."

But that's not all! I only bought one Transformers Cybertron figure and one Transformers Galaxy Force figure because I was collecting motorcycles, but I broke that by getting this major pimpin' muscle car.

Left: Transformers Cybertron Downshift. Right: Transformers Energon Powerlink Downshift.

He's smaller, but he's finally got leg articulation (the older Downshift on the right couldn't bend at the waist!)

Replies: 13

Flicks For Chicks
Posted by Albert, 3:39:30 AM 4th May 2006 in General

So I watched She's The Man. Amanda Byrnes plays the man well in this supposed chick flick (which never really struck me as one, as was White Chicks and The Hot Chick). She played the mannerisms very well, with the flighty eyes and very male expressions. She started off delivering her lines too fast (Gilmore Girls anyone?) but got natural soon. Funny and yet observant, a good teen flick.

The football team was cool, because every member looked like a real footballer. Heck, even the manager looked like someone you'd see at the back of a newspaper! Oh and I think Channing Tatum looks like a member of boyband Blue.

Oh, and Olivia is hot. Loved her little nuances like the smirk she did when she first bumped into Amanda. Girls don't even know they do it!

What are chick flicks? The Princess Diaries, for example. A guy would enjoy Too Fast Too Furious for the girls and the cars, because they'd look at the screen and go, wow. They'd know the cars and geek out about the spoilers and engine sounds etc. As for The Princess Diaries (2, since I didn't watch the first), I could hear every girl in the cinema geek out as the cupboards opened, revealing tiaras and necklaces. (Just like a guy would go ooo when a drawer opens with machineguns inside.)

Chick flicks are the sensitive antithesises to action movies.

Another sure-fire indicator would be an immensely female-oriented emotional epics that do not engage the interest of heterosexual males. If it does, then it is in the category of romantic comedy. Also, chick flicks take a more sombre tone; tuning down the humor to make sure the message gets across.

A guy would immediately go on defensive upon hearing such titles like Pride And Prejudice, Sense And Sensibility, As Good As It Gets, What Women Want, The First Wives Club etc. What the heck are these movies about?!? Even if we knew that Pride And Prejudice was based on a book, we know that the book isn't a book about cops and robbers and thus would not be enticed to watch it alone.

Come to think of it, the title itself lends a hint - an object in the title makes the deal for the object-oriented male, who would rather not deal with cryptic titles that allure to concepts, e.g. Monty Python And The Holy Grail versus Pride And Prejudice. We know damn well that when we watch it, there will be a Monty Python, and there will be a Holy Grail. We'll see the objects on screen represented in color and shape.

Often you can identify this with a poster of two lovebirds. Not all posters with lovebirds are chick flicks; it can be identified by the tendency of the actress to have sweet smiles instead of saucy scenes. Denise Richards is a sure indicator of some hot action (with the exception of I Do (But I Don't) where she plays a boring wedding planner, and I had the misfortune of seeing her... talent wasted like this on Hallmark.)

Oh, and any love story that shows on Hallmark is most likely a chick flick.

So why am I running off tangent from the intended blog entry about She's The Man? Must be the chick flicks. Don't get me wrong, I don't hate chick flicks; thrown into a cinema with one and I'd come up with some intelligent analysis of the movie after, I promise!

Replies: 6

Star Wars Stars Transformers
Posted by Albert, 2:02:14 AM 3rd May 2006 in Pictures, Toys, Geek

Okay, okay, so I actually got these early April. Here's to a healthier obsession, approved by the self-appointed emperor of the galaxy. Star Wars Transformers.

Boba Fett has a cool helmet. Well, cool enough that he managed to make mundane colors look cool.

Before and after: Anakin Skywalker dons the helmet to become Darth Vader.

first four arrivals here.

I'm still waiting for Han Solo and Chewbacca, who combine into... the Millenium Falcon! *dies a happy geek*

Replies: 10

N Now, N Seventy
Posted by Albert, 2:48:39 PM 2nd May 2006 in Pictures, Geek

Warning: Robosexual pr0n follows.

The Nokia N70.

Opera on EDGE. No, I do not have 3G, being on DiGi... but it still beats being the poster girl for EDGE and GPRS and not having one's phone set up for it. :P (I did set it up and now we can send MMS messages!)

Hey! I have the same phone as both of you! Now what?"

The infrared response is similiar to my Canon Powershot A520's; 10 stops slower than normal.

Siemens C30 (perhaps June 2001 to June 2002) - passed on from my father from a promotion. I discovered my Ah Beng roots (or maybe it was college.) I got myself a transparent casing to parade this in its red-lighted glory.

Nokia 3315 (June 2002 to December 2002) - I bought this, picking it over the Nokia 3350. Silly choice.

Nokia 3350 (December 2002 to April 2006) - This was technically superior, with 150 numbers phone memory, WAP and more keys. It was also the first Nokia to have disco lights that blink to the ringtone. If it had blue lights it would've been the first proper pre-modified Ah Beng phone. It had really slow Snake 2, too, even at its fastest difficulty.

Nokia N70 (April 2006 to now) - scroll up for pr0n.

(And here ends the meme. See, I made it easy for you.)

I initially thought it was a more corporate phone, with its stylings on the serious brushed metal side. Nope, it was an all-rounder - it already had loads of applications on the Symbian Series 60 platform. Radio, music player, calendar, photo editor (with crop, brightness etc.), Opera browser, and all localized network operator settings already preinstalled. So yeah, I could already choose Diginet to connect to the Internet. I did not really have to install much more - I could even browse the phone and card memory using Nokia PC Suite via Bluetooth. Yep, a (dual voltage reduced-size multimedia card) card reader via Bluetooth.

Bluetooth was a hassle at the office computer, but at home it worked perfectly. Weird.

I also organized all my applications into folders, because it was fun.

The stereo headset was awesome. You know it's good when you listen to music and discover little notes and sounds you've never heard in the song before. I copied Eric Johnson - A Song For Life into it, and the bright, sparkly notes flowed from left and right, like a waterfall, splashing in the center. Orgasmic!

Needless to say, I shall bring a tissue whenever I put these earphones on.

The first time I answered a phone call, I was awed by the stereoness of the human voice. It was coming from all directions! I was shy to answer the booming voice outside my head.

Cons? It was laggy. Starting up took 50 seconds or more. Applications took a while to load. The sliding lens cover at the back was loose, and if you held it by just the cover it felt like it would jump out of my hand.

And yes, it can be such a dastardly distraction, when I was waxing lyrical and obsessing over the phone in real life instead of paying attention to anything else.

Replies: 12

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